Tuesday, March 12, 2013

When is enough really enough?

I am writing again. I know, shocker right? I am actually avoiding some things I have to do and this is as good of a diversion as anything.

I have been wondering when enough is enough. I sometimes say, "I have had enough." or "I have taken on enough." but, I always end up taking on a little bit more and more. So, when I say "enough" what do I really mean?
I think it means, "I feel like I am overwhelmed and one more thing feels like it is going to break me." Have you ever had those kinds of feelings? Like you just couldn't take anymore?
I sure hope I am not alone in this.
I always draw strength from a spouse who is able to listen and not judge the stupidness that pours from my mouth. Sometimes, I just need to vent it out.
When I am feeling at my most overwhelmed the only way to find comfort is on my knees. Heavenly Father is willing to share the load with me. Too often we pray to take this burden from us. I think it is important to distinguish between the 2 sharing and taking. Heavenly Father can certainly take things from us. If He does than, when is our growth happening?
I am who I am today because He didn't take my trials away, He shared them with me. He eased my load when I thought I couldn't possibly do more.
He can do that for you too.
Many people ask, "How did you get so many children?" Let me assure you, this wasn't in our "master" plan. But, this was in our Master's plan for us. I have made no secret of this fact. I thought we were crazy adopting more children. Then, when we pray to know what to do, we would get the answer "you aren't done yet!" I am the first to admit it takes me some time to accept His will for me. It doesn't mean He will give me too much, it means He will stretch me and support me while I do His will.
That being said I often have cried in despair. "But, I can't take any more children."  Then, I feel the Holy Spirit touch me. I am then reminded, it isn't about you taking on more, it is about you being willing to do My will.
The bottom line is, we are His creation. Not just in the beginning. But, if we do His will He will continue to create the person He wants us to be. We are engraven upon His palms. He doesn't forget. It is us that forgets.
So, stretch yourself. It is painful, make no mistake. it is easier to be in the comfort of what we know. But, there is no fun in that! :) and more importantly no opportunity to grow and progress.

Back to our children, we trust that He will make up for our shortcomings. (Trust me, there is alot of short comings to make up for) Sometimes, I am able to do 90% of the work and some days on 20%. I definitely try my best but sometimes it is not very good. He makes up for the rest.
So, be bold! Be brave! Believe !  Trust! Growth is hard but so worth the effort.

Smile when life is hard. There is still joy to be found. Find it!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You are VERY much not alone in this! I'm just glad our "enough" was 12, not 16 or 19 :). I'm sad our enough included a son going back home at age 6 after having him for only 2 1/2 years. His Grace is amazing.